Love Lasts Read online

  “When will I see you next?” Dane asks. I shake my head.

  “I honestly don’t know. This will be bad.”

  “I’m sorry,” Dane says quietly. I think he means it, but it doesn’t matter. None of it matters. We don’t even matter. Only my parent’s trust in me matters right now, and I know I lost it big time.

  “I’ve got to go,” I say and start to open the door. Dane reaches over to me, so I give him a short kiss.

  “Maybe I should go in and talk to your dad. It’s my fault this happened,” Dane says, but I quickly shake my head.

  “That’s a horrible idea. He’s going to be furious, and I’d rather he didn’t see you. It would be bad. I’m going to go. Okay?” I let out a sigh and get out of the car.

  “Text me later,” Dane says.

  “I’ll try,” I say and close the car door.

  The front door is already unlocked when I reach it, so I push it open and only find my mom sitting at the kitchen table. Her face is wound up tightly, and it doesn’t change when she sees me.

  “Your father told me what happened. He’s in the shower to cool off because he was so angry,” Mom says. My heart aches, and my body hurts.

  When Dad gets out of the shower, he doesn’t even look at me for a couple minutes, and I know I’m in for a rude awakening.

  The conversation goes similarly to how I imagined it in my head. Dad leads the conversation as per usual, and Mom chimes in when there’s silence. They lecture me for lying. They lecture me for being stupid. And the worst of all, they tell me they’re disappointed in me.

  “Here we are, thinking you’re being responsible by telling us that your plans are changing, and you were actually lying to us.” I don’t argue. I knew Dane wasn’t taking us to the mall, so I should’ve told them the truth.

  “Out of all five of you, you were the one we would’ve never guessed would make such a stupid and careless decision. You’re supposed to be the role model for your siblings.” My hands shake. Not only have I failed my parents, but I’ve failed my siblings. They’re right to be angry with me, and I deserve this for being so careless.

  “This could cause you to lose your 21st Century Scholarship! Then how are you going to go to college? Because we sure don’t have the money to pay for you.” I bawl uncontrollably. My future is over. If I don’t get my scholarship, there’s no way I can afford to go to college. I can’t believe all of this is happening because we were in a park after dark. Who am I kidding? This is all my fault.

  “You know, I can read people, and I knew as soon as I met Dane that he was trouble. I knew he was going to lead you down a bad path, and I was right. You’re done going out with him. I never want to see his face around this house ever again.” My heart shatters. I want to beg my parents to let me continue to see Dane because he’s made me so happy these last few weeks, but I know they won’t change their minds. Dane and I are over.

  After two hours of my parents yelling at me and me crying and apologizing, they run out of things to say, and it looks like Dad’s head will explode from stress and anger.

  I’m excused, so I run upstairs and head straight into the bathroom with tears still streaming down my face. Jessica sees me as I walk by, and her face is red and blotchy. I close the bathroom door, lock it, and turn on the fan to drown out my crying. Now, not only have I made my parents angry, but I’ve made my little sister cry. And my brothers probably think I’m a horrible person now too. I’m never going to be the same in their eyes.

  I wrap my arms around my knees and dig my fingertips into my arms. Not even that pressure can distract me from the dull pain sitting inside me. I’ve ruined everything: my relationships with my family, my relationship with Dane, and even my chance at going to college. My entire future is ruined because I couldn’t learn to say “no.”

  As I stare at the floor in front of me, my body slowly stops shaking, and the tears finally stop falling. Emptiness fills my heart and mind instead, so I continue staring blankly at the floor.

  After who knows how long, someone knocks on the bathroom door. I stand up and look at myself in the mirror. My face is red and blotchy like Jessica’s was. I open the door and find Jessica standing a foot away.

  “I have to brush my teeth,” she says quietly. I walk around her and get into bed, and then I see Mom standing against the door frame of my bedroom. She looks sad. Everyone looks sad.

  “We know you’re sorry for what happened, but there’s no excuse. But, we are sorry that we yelled so much and made you so upset,” Mom says and takes a step inside my bedroom. “I wanted to tell you that we still love you, even if we’re mad. Okay? So we don’t want you beating yourself up all night. We’ll fix it all in the morning.” I only nod because my eyes fill up with tears again.

  “Okay. Goodnight. Love you,” Mom says.

  “Goodnight. Love you too,” I say quietly. She leaves, as Jessica comes back from the bathroom. I roll over and face the wall, willing the emotions to go away. Then, I remember Dane told me to text him.

  Jessica turns off the lights, so I fumble around to try and find my phone. I hear a thud and reach for the floor, finding my phone where it fell from the bed. I text Dane, telling him that it didn’t go well and that I’m not allowed to go out with him anymore. My mind feels empty. Dane messages me back a minute later.

  Does that mean we have to break up? I stare blankly at the message and shake my head to myself.

  No. I text back. We’ll figure it out.

  I lay my head down and shove my phone under my pillow. Before I know it, I fall asleep from being emotionally exhausted. I don’t dream of anything.

  CHAPTER 8

  When I wake up the next morning, my head pounds, and my eyeballs physically hurt. I want nothing more than to stay in my bed for the rest of the day, or even the rest of my life would be good. But I have to work later tonight, so I’ll at least have to leave my bedroom for that.

  Jessica is already gone by the time I wake up, so she must be downstairs. Everyone will be weird around me now, and I don’t want to deal with it.

  I find my phone under my pillow, and there are two new messages from Dane. I ignore them and shove my phone right back where it was before. There’s no point in talking to him today. Who knows if my parents will ever let me see him again, so our relationship could be as good as dead.

  I grunt and groan my way out of bed and to the bathroom. Turning on the lights pierces my eyes and makes the pain even worse. If I could guess, I’d imagine this is what it’s like to be hungover, except I’m only depressed. Fun.

  My eyes are bloodshot, even though I just woke up, and dark circles rest beneath my eyes. I guess no amount of sleep will make them go away. My hair is poofy and tangled, so I run my hands over it to smooth it out. I should probably shower. Crying makes me sweat, so I’m probably pretty rancid from last night. I don’t have the energy, but I also don’t want to go downstairs and face my family. So I close the bathroom door and force myself into the shower. Mostly, I stand under the steaming hot water and watch it turn my skin red, but I also force myself to clean my hair and body.

  When I finally get out and get dressed, an hour has passed. I take my chances and walk downstairs to make myself some toast. Thankfully, no one even looks at me. But when I stand in the kitchen, looking at the toaster, I no longer feel hungry enough to eat. So I sit down at the kitchen table with only my phone and text Dane back.

  I’m doing okay. How are you? I text. His message comes through after a minute.

  I’m okay. I miss you. I let out a breathe and text back.

  I miss you too. We’ll be okay.

  Around the corner comes Mom, and she looks at me with a small smile.

  “Good morning,” she says.

  “Good morning.” I place my phone down on the table, feeling guilty for texting Dane. My parents didn’t say texting was off-limits, but they would probably still be mad if they knew.

  “Do you have any plans for today?” She asks and then f
reezes. She doesn’t look at me. If I had plans, they would be with Dane, but she knows that.

  “I have to work tonight,” I say, saving her from her own misstep.

  She nods, and then the conversation is over. She walks out of the kitchen back to her bedroom.

  I watch my dad play video games in the living room for a few seconds. Jessica and Alec are on opposite couches, both holding a computer in their laps, and their eyes stay glued to their screens. No one notices me, so I leave the kitchen table and go back upstairs to bed.

  I lay in bed and fall asleep over and over again until four o’clock. Then, I get ready for work.

  When I get to the movie theater, I find that I’m working with a bunch of newbies behind concession. Tyler and Luke are working as ushers, and even though things are weird with Luke, I’d rather be working over there with them. At least then I would have someone to talk to about all the things running through my head.

  As if he reads my mind, halfway through my shift, my general manager asks me to go help the ushers clean theaters because they’re running behind. I actually smile for the first time today and rush over to grab a broom and dustpan to help.

  Tyler smiles when he sees me. Luke heads into a different theater.

  “Did Mr. Muncie say you could help us?” Tyler asks.

  “Yep!”

  “Great because Luke is moving so slowly tonight. He seems depressed, and it's probably all your fault,” Tyler says. He pushes open one of the theater doors and wheels in a trash can. I follow behind him with my broom and dustpan.

  “Well, he shouldn’t be depressed for long. Dane and I are probably over,” I say. Tyler turns to face me.

  “What? How?”

  “We got tickets last night for being in a park after it was closed. We didn’t know parks closed after sunset, but apparently, they do,” I explain. Tyler stares at me dumbfounded.

  “No way. You got a ticket? No way,” Tyler says. He walks down one aisle and begins sweeping, so I walk down the next aisle and do the same. This is the biggest theater, so it’ll take us a bit longer. And I’m grateful for the time to talk to Tyler alone because he is always supportive no matter what happens.

  “Yeah, my parents were super mad. They said I’m not allowed to go out with Dane anymore, so,” I trail off and shrug. “There’s not really anything I can do about it. It’s kind of ruined.”

  “I’m so shocked that you got a ticket,” Tyler repeats. I look at him and tilt my head.

  “Yes, I got a ticket. Now can you move on from that and help me. I actually thought, I don’t know, that Dane was a good guy. We actually got along so well.”

  “Just wait it out,” Tyler says.

  “Yeah, I guess. It’s just hard.”

  “Yeah, well, if you like him, don’t give up so easily.” I watch Tyler, as he moves through the aisles.

  “That’s probably the best advice you’ve ever given me,” I say and smile. Tyler smiles too.

  We finish cleaning up this theater and join Luke in the next one. He doesn’t talk to either of us, so the rest of the shift is pretty silent between all three of us. Once all the theaters are clean and back on track, I wave Tyler goodbye and head back to concession to help them close up.

  At the end of the night, Mr. Muncie thanks me for my help and tells me to keep my head up. It makes me pause because I don’t think he heard my conversation with Tyler, but I thank him and head home.

  I wonder if Dane is thinking about me as much as I’m thinking about him.

  ✦✦✦

  A few days of utter boredom and sadness pass.

  Dane and I text, but our conversations are becoming less frequent. I’m terrified that he’s going to break up with me, but I guess I can’t blame him if he does.

  It’s Valentine’s day, and my parents still won’t let us see each other.

  I walk down the hall to my locker at the end of the day and find my friend Allie awaiting me. Since Lin no longer speaks to me, Allie and I have started talking a lot more. Her and I slowly became friends in journalism class last year, and I’m lucky to have her as a friend because she’s positive and supportive. We have a lot more in common than Lin and I ever did too. For one, we’re both in choir. Plus, we’re both short with long brown hair. She’s prettier than me, but I don’t mind.

  “Hey, are you staying after school today?” Allie asks when I get close.

  Today is dance rehearsal for the class dance competition, and I was roped into competing because of Allie. I mean, I’m sure it’ll be a great accomplishment when it’s all over, but the rehearsals themselves are like hell. The cheerleaders want to be in charge, but their moves are basic. So the choir people like Allie and I who have learned choreography have been trying to incorporate more complex dance moves, and let’s just say that it’s not gone over well. It’s like World War III between the cheerleaders and choir nerds. I really don’t want to be a part of it anymore.

  “Yeah, I almost forgot. Thanks for reminding me,” I say. I’ll push through the turmoil for school spirit. Allie steps out of the way of my locker, so I open it and get my things.

  “It’s gonna be awful. You know that right?” Allie asks.

  “Yeah, unfortunately. At least we get to be a part of the partner dance,” I say.

  Every year, my class has started our dance with a partner dance with about eight couples, and every year, the couples have only been made up of cheerleaders and football players. But this year, they miraculously allowed Allie and I to join because we’re small, and they needed small girls for the fancy lifts we’re performing. It actually makes the whole experience more fun and tolerable.

  “Yeah, but Duncan literally throws me around everywhere. It hurts so bad. I almost want to ask for a new partner. I wish I had John. He seems way better,” Allie says.

  John is my dance partner, and I understand her desire to be in my place. He’s surprisingly a natural, and he’s patient with me when I mess up.

  “Really? I expected Duncan to be good since he’s in choir with you,” I say. I grab my backpack from my locker and close it, following Allie right across the hall to her locker.

  “I think that’s the problem. He thinks he’s so good when he’s not. He’s so… arrogant? Is that the right word?”

  “Yeah,” I say, “well, maybe you could switch with someone. You could probably switch with Lauren. It doesn’t seem like she’s really into it.” Allie nods and slowly opens her locker, moving around a pile of crumpled papers and folders to find something. When she finds a book, she puts it in her backpack and closes her locker.

  We start to walk towards the foyer where we’ll be practicing, and people rush around us. Some of them talk too loudly, and others already have earbuds in. They look down at the ground, as they walk. I’m always surprised when I realize how few people I actually know in this school.

  When Allie and I get to the front foyer, a few other juniors are already waiting. Only one cheerleader is here, but I’m sure the rest are coming.

  The school clears out in another fifteen minutes. Then, the only people left are students performing extracurriculars and teachers with too much work and not enough time.

  The cheerleaders direct practice, and I silently do as I’m told. All the people performing in the partner dance move to one side, and everyone else practices on the other side. John smiles at me when I join him.

  “Ready to practice some supermans?” He asks me, referring to the lift we’re supposed to do. I smile and nod, even though I’m not ready at all.

  We practice over and over again to the point where the music echoes in my head, but I still can’t do the lift properly. John lifts me with ease, but every time, I struggle to keep my legs straight because I have so little core strength‒or any strength really. After another try, John’s shoulder jabs into my stomach, and I wince and groan. He lets me down and apologizes, and I tell him I’m going to take a short break.

  I pass through the big group of students practicing th
e main choreography and find my phone in my purse. There’s a text from Dane.

  Can I bring you your Valentine’s Day gift? A smile creeps onto my face, and I quickly text back.

  I’m at school practicing for a dance competition. Do you want to bring it here? I can meet you outside. I wait a few minutes and get another text from Dane, telling me that he’ll be here in ten minutes.

  Butterflies start to fill my stomach, so I sit down. My foot taps up and down. I don’t know if it’s a bad idea for me to see Dane because of my parent’s restrictions, but I really want to. I guess it’s too late for me to stop it now. It’s not like I can tell him to go home. I mean, he got me presents already, and I got him a present.

  My heart stops for a second. I don’t have Dane’s gift with me. I pick up my phone and quickly send him a message.

  I don’t have your Valentine’s day gift… I wait for a response and realize he may be driving and can’t respond, but a few seconds later, a message pops up.

  It’s okay. 5 minutes.

  As promised, five minutes later, Dane’s car arrives outside, and I see it through the front windows of the school. My phone vibrates in my hands.

  I’m here. You might want to bring some help.

  I’m confused, but I look around for someone who will help me. I spot Allie talking to Duncan, so I rush over to her.

  “Hey, sorry to interrupt, can I borrow you for a second?” I ask Allie. Duncan walks away, and Allie rolls her eyes.

  “He’s so annoying,” she says, “But what’s up?” I look towards the window where I can still see Dane’s car.

  “My boyfriend is here with my Valentine’s Day gift because‒well, it’s complicated‒but he said I will need help. I don’t know exactly what that means, but could you come with me?” I ask. Allie’s face lights up, and she nods quickly.

  “Yes, I’d love to! Oh my god, I can’t wait to meet your boyfriend! Where does he go to school?” Allie asks and follows me across the foyer to the main doors of the school.